... Are surprisingly the last.
You'd think that the promise of going home would make these five minutes a deleriously happy festival of anticipation. They are instead a tension filled, slow moving hell that can determine one's mood for the remainder of the evening. This is due to that insidious beast... The Last Minute Customer.
The Last Minute Customer is the bane of my existance. He has hundreds of different faces (and odours). He doesn't appear to care that you want to go home. He doesn't care that you don't get paid after six. He'll gladly wander in at three minutes to, and pretty much refuse to leave until he's finished being served. This can take anywhere from five minutes (minor irritation), to half an hour (seething rage). If you try to hint to him that you might like him to go home now, he will ignore you. If you dare to do so much as outright chuck him out, he will explode in a fit of rage and complain to your head office.
He might not even buy anything. He'll gladly fart-arse about and waste your time, and do all the normal crap that customers do all day (only now it feels 100x more excruciating) without shame or apology, and still not spend any money.
Sometimes you will thwart him. You will get that door closed and locked before he makes it. But it isn't over. He will knock on the doors and windows, rattle the door handle, wave and shout at you, demanding to come in. Even if the shutters have been put down, he will still try to force the door open. If you just happen to unlock the door for a moment, to let your last customer out (another Last Minute Customer, successfully ousted), he will attempt to force his way in. As though that will earn him the right to be served.
I'd like to take a moment to point out that this is not the case. We're not running some grand challenge. We're not trying to lock that door to challenge you, to see if you can make it in and get served. We're doing it because we're finished. Entering the building does not alter this, i promise.
In one case, we actually had a guy come round to the back door, half an hour after closing, and had the cheek to complain (and threaten to complain to head office) because we wouldnt give him a refund. Bear in mind the tills weren't just closed, but cashed up and locked in the safe. I wasn't there personally, but i would have asked him just how he planned to word his complaint. 'They wouldn't give me a refund when I knocked at the delivery entrance half an hour after closing' wouldn't carry much weight, i imagine.
A lot of Last Minute Customers are difficult refunds. This is because they know you are much less likely to argue, as you want to go home. This is a false assumption. We know your game, and hate you viciously for it. You're more likely to get sent home and told to come back another time, or we'll simply choose to send it away for testing, which can take several weeks. You want to waste our time, we're only too happy to waste yours.
Now i know some people are working, and don't get out until we're nearly closed. This is not a valid excuse in my opinion. We sell next to nothing that could be described as an 'essential'. I don't see why your average person couldn't wait a day longer for anything they could buy from us. Therefore, i propose they do what i do. Go shopping on a day off. It makes sense you know.
Remember: When a store's opening hours are 9 till 6, or 10 till 8 or whatever, those are the hours it is open for. 6pm is not the time you need to arrive by to get served, it is the time we are finished, completely and totally. It is the time from which the company no longer pays us. Now I have a hard time caring about the average customer when i'm being paid to do so. Why i should care for free is beyond me. So do not arrive at a shop two minutes before closing, and expect more than two minutes service. If you need half an hour's service, arrive at the store more than half an hour before closing. It sounds simple, but apparently it isnt.
On a completely different note, when a customer points to a battery charger, and asks you what it is, or specifically points to the sign that says 'battery charger' and asks what it is, how do you explain it without using the words 'battery' or 'charger'?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
Hi p.r. Sorry about your torment.
I confess that I was recently queueing at the till, in W H Smith, at closing time, as one of the shop assistants was locking the door. A middle-aged lady was complaining vociferously because she had not been allowed to enter, and, apparently, there was something that she urgently needed to buy. 'But, madam,' said the shop assistant gravely, 'we have been open since 9am this morning!'
My middle son works for a well-known high street store, selling cds, dvds etc and shares your pain. Exchange students try his patience more than a little, but I think that he finds those customers who are being cared for in the community, the most challenging. I haven't used his phraseology, of course, but I think that is what he means!
It's simply amazing the amount of people who arrive five minutes after closing, find the door locked and the shutters down, and decide the best course of action is to try the door handle. When this fails, they resort to knocking on the door, as though we've accidently barred their entrance. The closing up woes are possibly my least favourite aspect of the job, which if you've read the rest of this blog, really is saying something.
Post a Comment